In my previous life, something I refer to as B.C. (Before Child), I loved Autumn. The slight chill in the morning air, always giving it a sense of freshness. The colors coming alive in the trees and shrubbery. The swirling of the falling leaves, the crunching sound of the leaves beneath my feet on a chilly evening walk. The idea of settling down into a routine again from the carefree summer days. The thoughts of all the upcoming holidays (I love decorating and planning the holidays). All of this has been great right up to this year. Even with child in tow the last 5 years things seemed to be as exciting and warming to my soul. However, this year it seems different.
Autumn is still beautiful, still gives me a comforting feeling, but it doesn't bring a real welcome to me. I hate to say this, but its lost that loving feeling (cue the Righteous Brothers). I find this Fall, in particular, it reminds me of time slipping away very fast. I was always told as a child by my grandparents and my parents that I should not rush time, as it will pass me by soon enough and then I will wonder where it went. I'm really getting that nowadays. So many things are within our control, but one thing that we will truly never have control over is time.
I can not sink into despair over time gone by, but I do cherish the memories it has gave to us. I think my feelings toward ALL of the season's has changed. I'm not so much in 'love' with any particular season, as I do truly have a strong 'like' for them all (yes, even winter), but I think I now have a LOVE for the time each season gives to us and the life events within. As sad as it can be to see everything changing so fast, kids growing up, wrinkles appearing (eek!), its also nice to know that I haven't wasted the time that was given to me. I don't feel cheated. Our family has created so many memories and will continue to create memories as time marches on. I just think I need to always remember its not the season that makes something special, its the memories within that time frame that makes it special. My child will grow up, its inevitable, and although I can not control the time passing us by so quickly, I can control how I take it all in and I choose to enjoy it, cherish it, LOVE it.
Life is the Season I love most.
Autumn in the city.
Remember with every second that passes, another is there to take its place and another memory is waiting to happen.
Take care and all the best,
Traci
